Don’t Call It a Comeback

I don’t want any crocodile tears later, so let’s make one thing clear right here, right now: I am not back. Sorry. Just like the elusive taco-flavored Doritos, I’m here to bust onto the scene for a hot second, just long enough for you to remember how much you loved my tangy and indescribably MSG-y taste before I disappear back into the Doritos Vault indefinitely. As you probably know, every now and then duty calls, and then I must pick up the phone, strap on my blogsuit, and type the bejeezus out of a few hot jams likely to blow all the wax out of your ears. Live from Rome, it’s probably nighttime where you are! (When it comes to figuring out time zones I’m complete cat vomit.)

First of all, let me apologize (good start, right?): I have no idea how overplayed any/all of these songs are in whatever country it is you access this site. After all, only 679 visits came from Italy in the last year, meaning that no one is here looking for the latest remix of Eurotrash Jam ‘10 “Stereolove,” which is fine, because I’m really not interested in hearing that song ever again. In my internet-restricted foreign prison, I’ve been at a loss to keep up with singles. Hype Machine doesn’t even work here. Can you imagine? THESE METH BUGS WON’T LEAVE ME ALONE. You know, the ones I get from not being able to surf Hype Machine. Get it? You get it. But, as such, I’ve been forced to kick it old school, listening to albums like some sort of old man. Grampa’s been able to scrounge up a few songs from between the sofa cushions, though, and he’s taking you all to Friendly’s for Clown Sundaes. Hooray!

First comes Big Boi’s infectious “Shutterbugg.” If that voice doesn’t snap you into an I <3 2001 nostalgia montage, you need clinical help. Outkast’s less cool half (sorry, but true) is shaking that comeback tree, and it sounds like MEMORIES. Damn, y’all. Then comes my favorite track off of what may be my favorite release of 2010 so far, Subiza by the Spanish popmeisters Delorean, which is so good that it inspired me to tweet. Desperate times, right? Next off the blocks is a Harlem Shakes track that’s been kicked up to 11 by Kids at the Bar, which comes at you courtesy of my ear to the ground in all things music, James, who’s been trying his damnedest to keep me looped through these trying times. Finally, the rainmaker: Biggie Smalls’ “Can I Get Witcha” blended seamlessly with honey-voiced Andrea Bocelli’s “Por Ti Volare,” a name which almost certainly means something in Italian. A properly abroad-infused mashup to keep you going. So gobble ‘em up fast, because these took me an hour to upload and who knows when you’ll see the likes of me around these e-parts again. Until June, soul clap, soul clap, can I get a little soul clap?

Shutterbugg – Big Boi (YSI)

Simple Graces – Delorean (YSI)

Strictly Game (Kids at the Bar Remix) – Harlem Shakes (YSI)

Can I Get Witcha? vs Por Ti Volare – Notorious BIG vs Andrea Bocelli (YSI)