The Animal Show does not and never will condone violence against any creature on the Earth. But, c'mon dudes, it's Tintin!

I can hear your thoughts. Fact. And I hear you thinking, “where the hell is Edward? Did that bastard ditch us again?” Shut up, mind noises. I’m right here. In fact, I’ve been sitting right here for the 2 weeks since I last posted. DOING WORK. Do you know what that’s like? No, you don’t, because you waste all your time reading WEBSITES. Laaaaaaaame. Seriously, I’ve been doing meaningful shit. Like analyzing pure monadic schemata. How much schematic analysis have you done recently? That’s what I thought. But now I’ve come out of the logical woods and back into civilization, arms full of musical goodies to distribute while you’re asleep, like Santa but with creepier facial hair. So leave your stockings near your router, because here I come.

First, it’s time for a hats off to Dave, for covering my absence so ably and wordily. He enlightened us with some pretty sick Arcade Fire b-sides, hit us with a NASTY Sufjan mash-up, and titled a post so well, I thought I was about to read some Magic Tree House fanfic (not the first time I’ve been disappointed by not finding some Magic Tree House fanfic). More importantly, however, Dave did the important work of reintroducing some oft-mentioned, never (til now) realized Animal Show features, namely album reviews. I’ve got a couple in the pipe, that I’m going to hit you with early next week (NEW SUFJAN NEW SUFJAN NEW SUFJAN). But first, I’munna bust you in the face with some JAMS. ANIMAL SHOW STYLE.

Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome back to the often-maligned but never forgotten Audio Safari! I set the bar pretty high there with how much I liked the Silver Sea’s “Imaginary Girl” (and if you don’t have that song, you should immediately click the link above and go download it and listen to it a million bajillion times and then burn it onto mix cds for all your friends, drawing hearts and stars around it on the enclosed tracklist). But I still stand behind these songs. They rule. Like them. Now.

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Flashing Lights (High Contrast Remix) – Kanye West (YSI)

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Never Chasing Pavement (Urban Noize Remix) – Jay-Z feat. Adele and Kanye West (YSI)

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Sleepyhead (The Knocks Remix) – Passion Pit (YSI)

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The Kids Don’t Stand a Chance (Miike Snow Remix) – Vampire Weekend (YSI)

Keep your eyes peeled for my promised review of Late for the Sky, as well as much BQE goodness.

Related posts:

1. Audio Safari!
2. Is It Time For An Audio Safari Again? Yes, Yes It Is Time For An Audio Safari Again.
3. Poker Face? I hardly know her!

Where would bloggers and 5th-graders completing Science Fair projects be without Google image search?

Every now and then, I get a late night call from Animal Show writer icebergxc, where he berates me for not posting enough remixes. Well, you smug bastard, here you go. Luckily for all of us, these songs are really quite bitchin’, so this is more than a conciliatory gesture to my asshole friend Drew. Instead, it’s a party kick-starter, like Immuzikation.

The dudes over at Chewy Chocolate Cookies make sweet and hot remixes which beg for comparisons to cookies straight out of the oven. But I’m going to resist the temptation, and will blaze my own metaphorical paths: these remixes are like hot dogs. The skin may be a little thick, but once you get inside, the meaty goodness is both strange and familiar. There’s a little bit of everything you like in there — sweet beats, awesome vocals, and brain-thumping bass. It’s nestled into a bun of high-hats, and then there’s like relish and stuff on top, or something. Anyway, listen and then order a chili dog.

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88 (Chewy Chocolate Cookies Remix) – The Cool Kids (mediafire)

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Hometown Glory (Chewy Chocolate Cookies Remix) – Adele (mediafire)

Related posts:

1. Remixed a Remix: Back to Normal
2. The Way Remixes Ought to Sound, Part I: "I Feel It All"
3. [Insert Super Smash Bros. Joke Here]